LET’S TALK ABOUT EMPATHY

Taking a week off sending ATH…

got me thinking about why this newsletter even started in the first place. Why do I write this thing? What am I trying to do? Why should anyone know or care about what’s ~going on~ in culture? And why do I care so much????? It would probably be a lot easier to go hang with my dog on a Friday at 5 and eat pizza but here I am. Every week. I don’t really know the answer to these questions. I guess I care because I think we should all consider things more. I think, sometimes, maybe if I pose the questions, we can start to make small shifts that might actually change the outrage we’re constantly hearing online and when we speak to each other. I think the polarization in our country has left so many of us feeling confused about what is okay to question. What is okay to have empathy for and what is simply “unacceptable”? Why are there so many rules? What happens if I break one of them? How will I know if I broke one? Will someone tell me?

American Culture is a fickle thing - we are a country interwoven by so many different backgrounds, habits, behaviors, and… cultures. It’s confusing why so many voices are screaming so loudly but, somehow, no one seems to be listening to anyone. Even the people who seem to be on the same side. Even me. Who tries so DESPERATELY not to be this way.

I feel bad for Kim because she is a woman with endless means and yet here she is, on the world’s stage (the internet) being harassed by her ex-partner. I feel bad for Kanye because he’s sick. He has a mental illness and being mentally ill is a disease for which there is no cure. But Kim and Kanye are just one example of how polarizing our culture has become. They’re an example of how we’re all hypocrites in some way. We built Kanye and Kim. You. And me. And brands. And the media. We all built them. We tuned in. We turned on to what they had to say. We are complicit in these sad and problematic behaviors. But it’s not entirely our fault.

So yes, I didn’t call last week because I put a little *TOO* much into my loathing for Kim, for the system, for the place we’re all in right now as a society. That’s okay. I’m allowed to be mad. I’m a human. And so are all of you. Being curious about culture, asking questions about behaviors and habits and norms is healthy as much as it is exhausting.

In doing so, we realize that some of the biggest issues in our modern culture are a lot more linked than we’re all willing to admit. It’s not *just* about Kim and Kanye. It’s about all the other things tied up in our opinions of them that make us all so deeply uncomfortable. And in that discomfort, we can start to peel away the layers to a solution that takes into consideration more than just ourselves.

I’m allowed to hate Kim and also not want her to be harassed. I’m allowed to hate Kanye and also advocate for mental health rights. I empathize with both sides. Empathy is not innate. It is a learned skill that develops by listening. Asking. Prodding. That’s what we do here. Don’t let anyone tell you to stop asking questions. Ever. We should all be asking questions. Even the hardest ones that maybe we don’t want to ask.

Next time, when it’s a hard topic, I promise to not leave you hanging. I promise to at least ask a few questions so we can all just try to figure it out together. I think that’s what we’re supposed to be doing. Right?